Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Not for the weak at body and mind

I have never been on the smaller side, well if you count me at age 5 in that equation then I guess I have.  Would I like to lose weight, sure but mostly I would like to get into shape.  The other Sunday I dropped my son off at the church daycare and as I walked up about 30 steps I realized that I was winded.  I was praying that no one would talk to me so I wouldn’t have to answer as if I just ran a marathon.    At that point I realized something had to change.  If I stayed the way I was I would never be able to do the things I would like with my son.  I want to be able to play a game of basketball or football with him when he’s old enough. 
So with that being said I started a boot camp, tonight was my first night and literally my body still feels weighed down.  I tried my all to keep up and finish and I did, but not without feeling nauseated and crying.   It was like that show the biggest loser when the people start to cry, I used to say “why are they crying,” but I now know.  Not only is boot camp physically taxing but also emotionally taxing.  Emotionally knowing that I let myself get so out of shape; without doing anything about it.  It was sad, I was upset with myself.  By the end my legs were spaghetti noodles and my arms were useless to me.  My girlfriend asked if I wanted a ride to my car and I said “no.”  I had to walk the hurt off.
Needless to say, I’m ready to see how much I can push myself.  I am finishing this even if it kills me and I very well may.

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